Thursday, 12 June 2014

a one hundred and fortieth story...'norman's thirtieth love letter'

Dear Ros-a-lind:

My Mrs Right, Snow White and Cinderella - do I have to spell it out?

I. L.O.V.E. Y.O.U. (reads a bit like an old telegram, no?)

However you try, you cannot rearrange these letters into any other form, or indeed alter both the expression and the sentiment.

I have a dictionary in front of me (the Shorter Oxford no less - all 2515 pages) and I quote: 'To entertain a great regard for; to hold dear; to be devoted or addicted to' ... is to LOVE.

I am your love-bird! (An uncommonly small member of the parrot family native to West Africa, remarkable for the affection it shows for its mate).

Rosalind, I hereby issue you a subpoena in the name of the lore of love!  Answer me! (Please?).

I can't live with the (imagined?) thought of you making mad, hot love to your Gym teacher friend (I assume he needs steroids to get it up), and I won't accept second best. (Especially as in this instance first is the worst and second - if me - is the best).  Rejection is one thing, but rejection in favour of a brainless fool is cruel.

I know (hope) you are a compassionate woman and have self-awareness enough to understand the effect someone of your immeasurably beauty can have on a man (even a man's man such as I). (When I say/write 'man's man' in this context I am not implying I am homosexual).  The world of men (heterosexual) has been rife with pestilence, evil and misery since Pandora opened her wretched toy chest: don't add to the fun and games (this last bit is irony by the way!).

At present, I am sitting on my balcony soaking up a little sun, listening to the background hum of the city - I would be relaxed if I felt confident of your affections; instead I realise I am in danger of becoming a Doubting Thomas! (... maybe, maybe not).

Oh! If ever I needed self-validation (being published doesn't, alas, seem to have delivered it)!

Yours elegiacally (sp?),

Norman,

... soul-mining.

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